I was introduced to Selena Quintinalla by my cousin a couple of weeks ago and I couldn’t believe I knew nothing of her until I saw the film ‘Selena’ which features Jennifer Lopez. I was amazed and touched by her story and she was a huge star who impacted on many people’s lives, including my own since watching this film and researching Selena’s life.

I’m not sure if I’m the only one who was out of the loop and didn’t know about Selena until now so for those of you that know her, you will know her story.

Selena was a Mexican-American singer who started singing at the tender age of 3. Her dad discovered she had really good pitch in her voice when she was 9. She recorded her first album at 14! What an accomplishment at such a young age.

She was in a band with her brother and sister but Selena was the true star of the show because of her amazing voice. She sang in Spanish but she never knew how to speak it initially so she learned it and taught herself phonetically.

Selena wasn’t popular in the beginning because of the dominating world of male Mexican singers and no one thought that she could be as good, if not better than them because of being female. It took a lot for her and the band to get to the brink of stardom but they did it! SELENA did it. She became so popular that she was seen as the Spanish version of Madonna by the Hispanic community and was known as ‘Queen of Tejano’.

Isn't she a fox!

She met her true love Chris Perez through her brother Abraham (Abi as Selena’s family called him) and was hired by Selena’s father to be a guitarist for the band. Selena and Chris fell in love and became inseparable although once her father found out about their relationship, he didn’t approve of it in the beginning but soon accepted them once the two got married on April 2, 1992. From what I’ve seen in the film and through research on You Tube and the Internet, Selena and Chris were such a cute couple and in every photo I’ve seen of them you can really tell that they were so in love and that their relationship was real.

Selena won many awards, one including ‘Best Female Vocalist’ in 1987 and her albums were really popular in the charts, 7 of her hits made it to number one!

She had such raw talent and her voice captured many. She was in the process of making her English album in 1995 and was scheduled to release it that Summer. Sadly, it would be Selena’s last year to perform and she would never get to finish the album that would have sold millions all over the world.

On March 31st 1995, which was only 2 days from Selena’s third wedding anniversary with Chris and almost a month before her 24th birthday Selena was shot and killed by her manager and so called friend known as Yolanda Saldivar. To cut a long story short, Selena’s family discovered that she was embezzling money from Selena’s fame and fortune and Selena had met up with her to discuss missing financial papers. Selena had no reason to believe that her life was in any danger. Unfortunately though, her giving and trusting nature got the better of her.

The ending of her life was so tragic and not simply because it was a death in general, but because Selena was on the verge of becoming a mega star, she had a beautiful marriage with someone who loved her unconditionally, she made plans to have children, she was a modest, kind person and she died at such a young age, too young to be taken away.

The film and her story affected me and I was and still am, saddened by her death. Selena was such a beautiful, gorgeous person but not only on the outside, but on the inside as well. She visited schools and stressed the importance of education and from what I researched she was a giving, caring, loving person who opened her heart to everyone. In an interview with Chris Perez that I watched, it was mentioned that Selena would always continue to be open to people and this worried Chris because it made her vulnerable. Nonetheless, it’s what made Selena such a beautiful person. I never knew her when was alive and rising to fame but through the film, her story and her music I have really grown to love her.

I’ve seen videos of her concerts, in particular ‘The Last Concert’ which was Selena’s last time to perform before she died. She had a lot of energy and she knew how to work an audience. She was a natural performer and loved her fans. I love the fact that she was just herself and that when she walked off stage at her last concert and was driven away, she waved to her fans the whole time until she disappeared into the distance. She was a beautiful person, always smiling, always happy.

I like her music, both her Spanish and English songs. My favourite is ‘Dreaming of you’. It has a really nice tune and melody. I heard it on the radio today and it always makes me cry when I hear it because Selena was so beautiful with such an amazing gift and she died so tragically and could not live to continue her music and become an even bigger star than she already was. She didn’t deserve to die in such a way. It was also the ending song to the film showing pictures and video clips of the real Selena and it plays during the scene when the family find out Selena died. It was so sad, especially seeing the way Chris (the actor in this instance) was affected. Seeing his reaction and thinking that’s how the real Chris Perez felt and how he had been affected by losing the love of his life made me cry so much.

It angers me that a person could do such a thing to someone who was so kind and from discovering from the film, gave Yolanda anything she asked for. Selena put all her trust into this woman and was betrayed by her.

Her death had a huge impact on her fans and it was breaking news, interrupting TV programs. Her music played continually on Texas radio, where she was from and People magazine dedicated an issue to Selena that sold over thousands of copies.

Her legacy still lives on and for those that loved her, she will never be forgotten. She inspires me to discover your dreams and make them come true and she’s made me realise that anything is possible and that you can be anyone you want to be if you really strive for it.

I wish she was still around because I know she would be such a huge success and she’d live to have a family with Chris and make her other lifelong dreams with him come true.

Selena, I never knew you when you were alive but finding out about you and your life has had a huge impact on me and has made me really love you and the amazing music you created. May you forever R.I.P.


What invention do you most need right now?

This is the first blog topic I’ve posted that I have not created. I was on and found this topic which I can really relate to at the moment.

Since I am overseas and far far away from my loved ones, I would love to have a teleportation ring I could jump into and go back home whenever I wanted to check on things and see friends and family who I miss so much. And my cat Archie too. I love my cat ๐Ÿ™‚

I was actually discussing this notion with one of my best friends on Skype and we both agreed it’s what we need. How easy would it be to just go into another world, another place in an instant? We would put airlines out of business!

I hope this creation will somehow exist one day ๐Ÿ™‚

The wrong crowd

We all like to look good when we go out but how much is too much?

I went out with my cousins yesterday and was approached by two sleazy guys who said ‘Hey baby what’s going on?’ In the instance that I ignored them, they followed me and said ‘Hey babe can I talk to you for a second?’ I kept walking and my cousin got closer to me which made these two guys go away.

This isn’t the first time it’s happened and I seem to attract the wrong people. Sometimes I feel I should dress down and not wear make up for sleazy comments from guys to stop. Maybe a nice guy would approach me when I decide to look natural on some days.

It just gets really frustrating when you want to look nice and it makes you feel good but a lot of the time the wrong people have to make horrid remarks and wolf whistles.

The same thing happens if I wait at a bus stop on a main road. Cars come passed and just beep. It’s so annoying!

If only there weren’t guys who are that sleazy and make those comments but it’s bound to happen unfortunately. It’s quite sad to know that physical appearances get abused and aren’t looked at respectfully. Some girls honestly just want to look and feel good and wear clothes that suit their bodies without implying they want anything from guys.

All I’ve got to do is just mind my own business as I usually do and pretend they aren’t even there.

Looking good doesn’t always give us the results we want!

The law of attraction

The law of attraction is a term used in The Secret which means attracting our thoughts and drawing them to ourselves whether they are good or bad. It is the most powerful law in the universe because YOU attract what you want in your life and whatever thoughts are on your mind, you are emitting that onto a frequency to the Universe and those thoughts are transmitted back to you. Whatever it is you’re feeling is what you will receive.

This law fits in with something that happened to me today – I was at a department store minding my own business when a lovely man came up to me and told me: ‘You are so beautiful’ And it was so unexpected. I was so thankful for his compliment and it was so nice of him to say. He said it in such a respectful way too. Now I don’t intend to be up myself in any way at all here, but I’m happy he said that because I know I am and it’s because I feel good about myself and have been attracting thoughts of high self-esteem, knowing I look good, feeling good within myself that I’m receiving such compliments. I never used to be told this near as much or at all randomly when I had low self esteem because I didn’t believe in myself. I never believed I was beautiful at all.

Being positive and feeling happy within yourself brings so much good into your life. ‘Like attracts like’ as The Secret states and if you are constantly having happy thoughts then you are attracting that back into your life. The more good you feel, the more good things will come to you.

It works the same with negative thoughts. If you keep thinking them, negativity is what you are transmitting back.

‘Everything you want is an inside job! The outside world is the world of effects; it’s the result of thoughts’
– The Secret

Always remember to attract the good instead of the bad!

Ignorance is bliss

If someone tries to annoy me by attacking me and saying bad things about me to try and bring me down, I get so tempted to fire up and write horrible things back to defend myself and make that other person look bad.

Well what I’ve learned is that it’s not always necessary to fight back or try and reason with people because I see that as sinking to their level by bringing them down when they have done the same to you. Not only that, but if they are the ones who are angry and are adamant about their view of you as a person and reasons against you it’s pretty obvious they could care less about what you have to say back if you plan to write an essay of a reply. A lot of people also want the attention and expect you to reply as well, even though they won’t care about what you have to say. That’s why I believe in doing the opposite of what they expect because ignorance is bliss! People will be shocked and pissed off when they realise that you are not giving them the time of day.

By responding, you are also opening the line of communication between you and that person and you are allowing them a reason to respond, and possibly say even worse things back to you. It’s not worth the drama and it’s too much energy to fight back. Sometimes the best thing to say, is to say nothing at all. As long as you don’t let people bring you down and you know you’re right, at least you’re being the bigger person. Make them look like the fools for wasting their time on you!

Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.

I never thought I would be able to talk about a break up I went through without getting emotional but here I am, about to do so.

I was with a guy for three years and we broke up about a year and a half ago. I was very back and forth with him afterwards – talking, then not talking and so forth. I was taking so many steps backwards in to moving on but for anyone who has been in a long term relationship and have broken up, you would understand how hard it is to avoid that one person who you’ve shared so much with and who’s been in your life for a long time.

Those closest to me know how much I was affected by the break up and how much I let it ruin my life! And none of it was worth it.

Referring to my ‘I am number one’ blog, I mentioned how I would always try and please my ex boyfriend so he was happy and as a result, neglecting my needs, my health and my happiness. I did that for months and months, even though I knew it was for nothing and knew it was a waste of my time and effort and that it was a cost to my happiness.

It’s so strange how one person can affect your life so much and make you do extreme things and go to desperate measures. You become a different person, what I’d like to call, the worst version of yourself. I was never happy with my ex boyfriend in my life and even when I thought I was, it didn’t last very long. I knew that he was making me unhappy but I never kept away from him, as much as I knew I should have.

After a year and a half of almost hell, I can safely say that I have accepted that my relationship with my ex boyfriend is over and it’s time for me to move on, which I have already been doing this past month while being away.

All the times I was miserable and let my ex boyfriend consume my life, I never thought I could get through it and I never thought that I could get over him.
But this past month away has done wonders for my emotional and physical health. I laugh everyday, I’m always smiling, I’m a better friend, sister and daughter and I appreciate life so much more. I also run everyday, eat less and eat better and I’m feeling great!

Don’t get me wrong, break ups are hard and I went through a lot but I am so happy that I’m in the healing process and taking care of myself, doing things to make me happy and not worrying about what anyone else wants because I know that I’m important and deserve to feel and be happy.

I don’t feel guilty, regretful or sad about the break up or how things have turned out from then on because I know everything happens for a reason and not every relationship is meant to be. There is a lot worse out there and I’m
lucky I didn’t go through a relationship that lasted longer through to an engagement or marriage!

Despite the pain it did put me through, pain is more than likely to occur and exist which we have to accept but to suffer is a CHOICE. And I choose not to suffer over an experience that I am already starting to heal from and one in which I am becoming a much better and stronger person.

I can’t even remember the last time I felt this happy but I am very glad that I have reached this point. We always get there in the end. All it takes is time,
patience, acceptance and realisation that life does get better and that there is a bigger world beyond that one guy we thought we would be with for a life time. As one door closes, another one opens and I am so excited to experience this beautiful world and what challenges it brings me! Onward and upward!

Loved and dearest

What inspired me to write this blog is my family. They are such important people in my life and they play a major part in making me the person I am today. They are my most loved and dearest people in the whole world.

Last night I was on Skype with my niece and auntie and it was so good to hear their voices after a month. We talked for hours, laughed, exchanged life stories but what was the most touching to me was that my family is so supportive of me and my travel plans and they have really noticed the changes it has done to my life. They can see I’m really happy, positive and just loving life! And it makes me feel so good about myself and very confident. I have such a high self esteem and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

The first thing my auntie noticed was my weight, she could tell I had lost a lot in a good way according to her so I guess all this running and non excessive eating regime is really paying off! It means so much to me that my family can see the changes and it just makes me more motivated to keep it all up!

When family make you feel so great, you know that’s all you need. I know I’m very much loved by them which is why I maintain being positive and happy so they can be surrounded by that.

I love my family and I wouldn’t trade them for anyone.

My best friend

I have a sister who is 20 years old and only a year apart from me who I am extremely close to. Her name is Sarah and she is my best friend.

For those of you who have a sibling/s do you have a close bond too? I really don’t believe in sibling rivalry and I couldn’t imagine not being close to my own sister. Most of my friends have close bonds with their siblings which is really nice because at the end of the day, they are all you’ve got. Your siblings are your flesh and blood and are always going to be there for you no matter what.

I’ve been in America for a month now and I have never been away from my sister for this long and I really miss her because I usually see her everyday. I finally got in touch with her last night and we were on the phone for a good two hours. Hearing her voice and cracking up jokes like we do at home made me so happy and grateful that I am close to someone who is so amazing and who is apart of me.

Sarah and I share absolutely everything together. I trust her with my life and I would do absolutely anything for her. We get along so well and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

There are people out there who aren’t close to their siblings for whatever reasons may be but I just can’t understand how people cannot be close to their siblings. To dislike like them, hate them. I couldn’t imagine feeling that way towards Sarah. She keeps me sane, she makes me laugh and most of all, she is THERE. Sisters are the best! And life without her would not be the same. It would be like being deaf and blind at the same time. She’s my life and I appreciate her so much. You’re the best Sarah! I LOVE YOU!


Healthy habits

I’ve been keeping up with my daily exercise routine since I’ve been back from LA. I didn’t feel like I was missing out on too much exercise while I was up there though because I walked around for hours every day! Yesterday I went on an evening run which felt fantastic and today I fit in 40 crunches which is a good start for me and went on a fast pace walk. I still love my junk food but I don’t go near it as much here as I would normally back home. I eat at home most days now and don’t feel so bloated all the time. I also made the decision to reduce how much I drink and even stop drinking for awhile because it still isn’t very good for me at the moment. Although I have a better outlook on life and am a happier person, nothing is perfect and there are still times I stress out a little and there are still underlying issues I am getting past and they somehow always seem to come through in my emotions when I drink. It never brings out the best in me and I always seem to be very emotional towards the end of the night and once I’ve stopped drinking. I recently made a massive fool of myself whilst in LA with some really good people but the funny thing is, I was having a really good night before it all happened. Not that I want to be focusing on that but I guess I thought I was ready to drink again because I’ve been feeling happier but I’ve realised that what’s happened in my life isn’t going to be quickly fixed with alcohol. I accept that though and I’m very patient with taking each day as it comes and taking it slow. Alcohol is not the solution. I need to slowly work my way up again and steer clear of it until I’m more emotionally stable. I am doing much better though as you can see from recent posts and I still love life and will always have an open mind to every situation. I’m happy I’m keeping up with one healthy habit for now at least.

Just laugh it off!

I’m pretty sure most of us have been through stressful times, whether minimal or extreme. And I’m pretty sure we have all been through a time where things are going really great for us and we’re really happy and some ‘one’ or some ‘people’ crap all over it and try and ruin it for us. When certain situations get us down we can change that mood in an instant! Since reading The Secret I have learned that you can have the choice to feel a certain way. YOU can choose the way you want to live your life and how you react to things. If you’re focusing on stressful situations and making yourself feel sad, then your going to constantly bring that negativity onto yourself. And if you want to feel happy it works the same way and you can change to that mood in an instant! I’m more than certain we would rather feel the latter. It is very true though. There is a lot of stress and hard times in this world but we can’t let it get to the point that we feel that there is no way out. We don’t have to feel sad about something if we don’t want to. Any situation, no matter how bad it may seem can be turned into a good one but it’s all up to YOU to turn it around.

I like to say that I’m more of a positive, open minded person these days but in the past when I’ve gone through terrible situations I have felt like it’s the end of the world, that there will be no solution and that the issue will never go away so I would keep focusing on it, bringing more misery into my life, taking things out on my loved ones and neglecting my needs. I know now that all of those feelings were unnecessary. Don’t get me wrong, of course we’re all allowed to feel sad and feel like crap at times, no day is ever perfect and we can’t expect it to be butย  we shouldn’t have to make ourselves feel that way all the time. If you want to feel happy, you can change that immediately! Put on some good music – I recommend anything you can dance to because it gets your energy up, it’s good exercise and I can guarantee it will make you feel good straight away ๐Ÿ™‚ It’s one of the things I love to do when I don’t want to focus on something that will stress me out. Go on a walk, a run, read a book or even go to your favourite place and just relax and write in a journal. Do whatever you know will put that smile on your face. There is ALWAYS something that will make you feel better. You’ve just got to find it and use it and you will turn that frown upside down!

A great thing that I’ve taken out from The Secret is to write a list ofย  ‘Secret Shifters’ down – these are things that make you feel better, things that make you laugh and feel happy. I have things included such as the beach because it’s one of my favourite places to be and somewhere I feel really calm, I have jokes between friends and I written down, my sister, my dad, things I like etc. These are all things that make me feel good. Different things you have on your list will shift your mood at different times so if you find that one of them doesn’t work, then move on to another. For example, thinking about the beach might not change my mood on one particular day but if I look at a joke between me and my friends, that is the primary thing that will make me feel better on that day. So it all depends but there is always something in that list that will lift your mood right up! So I recommend you all write a Secret Shifters list and keep it with you everywhere you go or somewhere you know you’ll always look at it.

But the most important point of all to stressful situations and to anyone who tries to bring you down is to just LAUGH IT OFF. There is nothing better than laughing about something that makes you sad. If you can’t do anything else, just laugh ๐Ÿ™‚ It’s the best medicine after all, it makes us feel GOOD and everything seems so much easier and less of a problem. Whatever is going on in your life just disappears because you’re not focusing on the bad points. When it comes to people who are trying to get in your way, piss you off and bring you down for no good reason, just think to yourself, they are only trying to put you down for something they are lacking in their own lives and to feel better about themselves. So there is no point in feeling sad about it. In the end, they’re the ones who look like fools. WHO CARES! Laugh everything offย  and the world will become a better place I can guarantee it ๐Ÿ™‚

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